My tribe aka village
May 23, 2018
My tribe. “They” say that it takes a village to raise a child and that is so true! When I first had Tristan I heard about a great group that is a safe and welcoming space for mums where they have guest speakers about all things baby and you can breastfeed there and there are other mums that you can connect with and they serve you tea, coffee & biscuits. This sounded right up my alley so off I went to my first meeting (now I sound like I’m attending alcoholics anonymous). Long story short I met the most fantastic group of mums and they’ve turned into my village. We actually call ourselves the Champagne Club because, well, as the name explains, we love champagne. Once a week (whilst everyone was still on maternity leave) we used to meet for a catch up while our babies initially just lay there until now when they run around causing havoc and (we) drink champagne. Initially it was “good” for our breastmilk production but we’re no longer breastfeeding and now it’s for moral support and group “therapy”.
But let’s talk more about raising a kid in modern society. It’s isolating, you do it alone and it’s really tough. Gone are the days when you’d call your mom from next door or your aunt or some close friend or relative who lived next door to you to look after your child. Most of the time you didn’t even need to ask them, they just did it because they had kids and they were always all together. Gone are those days when your village, literally, helped raise your child/ren. Now we must do it alone and even more so if your family (aka mom & dad) don’t live close.
My tribe has seen me through a lot; from postnatal depression to toddler behaviour and they’ve always been 100% supportive and understanding. No judgement or criticism. I hope that we will always be friends and enjoy each others company and watch our first and any subsequent children grow up together. They are my family and are so important to me.
Do you have a tribe? You don’t need to feel isolated raising your child/ren and I feel it’s so important to connect with other moms going through the same thing as you that you can bounce ideas off, have wine/gin/champagne with and just generally have others who support and understand you.